Unity Candle Lighting Ceremony

The Unity Candle Lighting Ceremony seems to only have been around for the past 30 to 40 years. It is held to symbolise the joining of two hearts and lives. Some couples choose to have each of their mother’s come up and light their candles, although it can be close friends or one special friend who lights them. Some couples choose to have an appropriate piece of music playing, others have chosen vows to say, and others choose to have their celebrant say some words.

This ceremony usually has one middle candle and two taper candles that are placed either side of it. At the beginning of this ceremony the two taper candles are lit by somebody special either a family member or friend, but it can be both mother’s who come up and light their own child’s candle. The couple then light the main candle together, symbolising that they are individuals who are now joined as one.  They can then either place their still lit candle back into its holder, to symbolise that they remain individuals, or they can blow their candles out to symbolise the extinguishing of their two single lives.

I have seen ceremonies where other family members also have had a candle each.  It is sometimes performed to symbolise the joining together of the two families, and their love for the bride and groom, into one united family that loves the new husband and wife.

If there are children from previous marriages who are old enough, they can also be included in this ceremony. They have a small candle each and they along with the Bride and Groom light the main candle together.  Children like to be included in the wedding ceremony, and this is a lovely way for them to do so.

An example of vows that you can say:

Bride to Groom  -  “This is my pledge, I will be there always

You will know it by my touch and see it in my eyes

I will stay by your side as your husband / wife

I will love you forever “

Groom to Bride

Celebrant

Celebrant:  “Light is the essence of our existence. Each one of us possesses an inner glow that represents our hopes, our dreams and aspirations in life. Grooms name and Brides name, the two candle flames represent your lives before this day, individual and unique. Bride’s mother, and Groom’s please come up and light  ——— and ———— candles. These candles symbolise your life before today, and as you together light the center candle, to symbolise the union of your previous individual lives. As this larger flame burns undivided, this is how your lives will be from now on. For as a couple you are more than just one, having the person that you love above all others by your side to share in your hopes, dreams and plans for the future enlarges and enriches you both. The individual candles represent all that makes each of you the wonderful and unique person the other admires and respects. The Unity candle in the center symbolises the union of your lives, families and friends, as well as your shinning commitment to each other, and to a lasting and loving marriage.

This ceremony can be held prior to the vows being taken.

Celebrant while facing the Bride and Groom, “Name and Name, the light in each of these two candles, symbolises everything that you are as an individual; your memories, dreams, desires, your love for each other, family and friends.  I would like to invite your Mother’s (Groomsman, Bridesmaid, Best friends) to light the candles of name and name”. Often two people come up, one for each candle, (there is something really special about the two mother’s being part of this ceremony, in my view).

Celebrant turns to face the guests “Name and Name stand before you, their loved ones and friends, still two separate and unique individuals, bringing their own special qualities, unique talents and experiences symbolised by the light in each of these candles. Today they choose to be united in marriage.